Celebrity Gossip

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He’s a has-been action star, but that doesn’t stop Jean-Claude Van Damme from testing out his mojo on any female that has the unfortunate job of interviewing him. Take this new interchange between Jean-Claude and a Newsweek reporter. Oh, and just for the record? Van Damme is MARRIED, 48, and the reporter is all of 22 years old. Gross. The Newsweek reporter’s words are bolded.

I really opened myself up in “JCVD.” I peeled back the skin of the fruit, cut the pulp and then took that very hard seed. In this film I cut that hard seed, and inside that seed was a kind of liquid cream substance of the man I am, or the woman you are.

OK –

It was like being naked–I would love to be naked in front of you.

More grossness after the jump:

Well, I –
Not being naked being naked. I say such things in Hong Kong and they thought I was being a crazy Frenchman. Being naked of protection.

So you ‘ ve no regrets at all?
Believe me–I’ve done very good stuff and very crazy stuff, and I don’t regret the crazy stuff. So are you in New York?

Yes, I am.
And are you 27, or 32?

I ‘ m 22.
Oh, f—. That is very young. Will you come to the premiere?

I don ‘ t know. When is it?
I don’t know. You will wear all black, a black dress and high heels?

Uh –
You can come find me, I will be the one with the very broad shoulders, dark hair and a simple suit. We can have some champagne, you and me.

- source

LOL! I bet you anything she was trying not to laugh at this goober. Just for fun, here’s a clip in which we see Van Damme busting a move:

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Now, THIS is kinda freaky. Apparently, Jennifer Garner has a psychotic stalker that has been following her every move from state to state, sending her weird letters and packages, and he’s even picked up and moved to Los Angeles to be closer to her! She’s had to file a restraining order against this loony tunes, and in the document, she says:

“He has now shown up at my private residence and has repeatedly expressed his belief that God has sent him a vision of me being persecuted in some manner that might result in my death,” Garner says.

- source

Ugh! This is scary stuff, people. Hopefully this guy will catch the hint and go get some serious medical help!

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From her nipples. You fot it, Mischa Barton is inviting you to go to her website and check out her nipples. Hey, don’t ask, just check out the video.

This isn’t hot. Paris Hilton and Benji Madden are dunzo. This was confirmed by Paris Hilton’s representative.

“Even though they are still in love, they felt it would be better to just be friends,” a source close to Hilton, 27, tells Us.
“Benji was overprotective and controlling. He doesn’t get along with any of her friends,” the source tells Us. “Friends thought Paris had changed since being with Benji and she wants to be herself again.”
The couple stayed faithful to each other, stresses the source. Hilton was spotted with her ex, shipping heir Stavros Niarchos, in Miami over the weekend, while Madden, 29, hung in NYC with his bro, Joel (beau of Hilton’s best friend, Nicole Richie).
“Nothing went on between Paris and Stav in Miami,” the source tells Us. “She was there for a girls weekend with her BFFs.”

You know what stands out to me in all this? The fact that Paris Hilton has a representative on her love life. What the heck? These bloggers have really gone too far in making her love life a centerpiece for subject matters. Oh, yeah, that’s what I do.

In England, Guy Ritchie is entitled to half of everything Madonna has. And he has decided to take none. Guy Ritchie is worth roughly 30 million dollars and is apparently tired of Madonna, because he certainly doesn’t want anymore from her. I wonder if he’d take half of A-Rod’s cash? Sorry, I just had to. You go boy, although I’d go ahead and take the extra cash for the years of inconvenience….

Although Ritchie, himself believed to be worth £30m, was entitled under English divorce law to as much as half of her wealth, sources suggest he has done a ‘Piper’ - a reference to Billie Piper, the actress who divorced the broadcaster Chris Evans without asking for anything.
The stumbling block in the split had been over where Ritchie and Madonna’s children will now live.
Madonna, 50, wished to take the children back to New York while Ritchie, 40, wanted to keep his sons in London, where they have grown up.
The source said a compromise had now been reached which will see the two boys - Rocco, eight, and three-year-old adopted David - dividing their time between Britain and the US.

Apparently Jennifer Garner has had to file a restraining order from some religious zealot nutbag who wants to stalk her and her kid.  Steven Burky, the accused, apparently likes writing letters that are primarily based on insanity and delusions, the two of which go hand-in-hand.

In papers filed in Los Angeles Superior Court on Nov. 7, the mom-to-be asks for protection against Steven R. Burky, 36, who she alleges has “engaged in obsessive and harassing behavior, posting about me on the Internet, sending me multiple packages and letters containing delusional and paranoid thoughts and following me around the country, through multiple states, to make contact with me.”
Jennifer’s sworn affidavit states that Burky has shown up at her private residence — where she lives with hubby Ben Affleck and their 2-year-old, Violet — and said that “God sent him a vision” that the actress would be persecuted in a way that could result in her death.

Throughout its history, various cities and towns in the United States have implemented laws that are detrimental to women’s rights at best, and downright kick the entire feminist ideal back into the Middle Ages at worst.

Now some of the sexist laws listed below may no longer be in place, and we’re not really sure which ones are still being strictly enforced today, but the fact that they did were put on the books not too long ago should make an American think twice about ranting against some countries, particularly in the Middle East, that don’t treat their women all that well. The US, after all, also has its share of unfair laws against women.

1. A woman caught adjusting her stockings in public in either Dennison,Texas or Bristol, Tennessee could get up to 12 months in the state penitentiary.

2. Michigan state law says women have to get their spouses’ permission to get their hair done because legally, their wives’ hair belong to them.

3. In New Mexico, women are strictly forbidden to appear unshaven in public. The waxing business must be pretty good there.

4. In Owensboro, Kentucky, buying a new hat without her husband trying it on first is illegal.

5. In Tremonton, Utah, it is illegal to have sex while riding in an ambulance. Fair enough, except for the part where, if caught, only the woman can be charged with a sexual misdemeanor and “her name is to be published in the local newspaper”, while her partner won’t be charged and will remain anonymous.

6. In Vermont, It is illegal for women to wear false teeth without the written permission of their husbands.

7. It is illegal for women to wear pants in the city of Tucson, Arizona.

8. A special cleaning ordinance was issued in Pennsylvania that bans housewives from hiding dirt and dust under a rug in a dwelling. No word on whether this applies to househusbands as well.

9. In Florida, a woman caught catching z’s while under a hair dryer in a salon will be subjected to a fine. The same goes for the salon owner as well.

10. Patent-leather shoes are a no-no for women in Cleveland, Ohio, for the reason that the shiny finish of the shoes could help a man catch a reflection of their more private parts, especially when they’re wearing skirts.

11. In Memphis, Tennessee, women can’t drive a car unless “a man must walk or run in front of the vehicle, waving a red flag in order to warn approaching pedestrians and motorists.”

12. In Maryland, a woman may not go through her husband’s pockets while he is sleeping.

13. Unless she is married, a woman is prohibited from parachuting on Sunday afternoons. Whatever being married or just being a woman has anything to do with parachuting is beyond anyone.

14. In Missouri, four women may not rent an apartment together.

15. A state law in Illinois dictates that all bachelors should be called master, not mister, when addressed by their female counterparts.

16. It is illegal for a lady to lift her skirt more than six inches while walking through a mud puddle in Michigan.

17. It is against the law in Oklahoma for females to do their own hair without getting a license from the state.

18. In Dyersburg, Tennessee, it is illegal for a woman to call a man on a date.

19.  A woman in Oxford, Ohio is forbidden from taking her clothes off while standing in front of a man’s picture.

20.  An old (and hopefully repealed by now) law in Little Rock, Arkansas states that a man is legally allowed to beat his wife, but only when he uses a stick that is no more than three inches wide, and only once a month.